Logos Are Hard
Welcome to my website! and thank you for taking the time to read my blog. This is such an exciting first step for me. Since I was youngI knew i wanted to do something great, and something unique (like every child not the planet). I never quite knew what it was exactly but I knew if i kept checking in with my happiness level, then i would be able to gauge if I'm headed in the right direction. *Cue Happy Gauge Now!*yup doing good, I'm going to keep writing! I have been an artist my entire life, but I didn't truly self identify as an artist until recently. Why is that? Oh that answer is easy, INSECURITY. The lack of an identity in my life, is cause by my fear of my insecurities. Like everyone in life, I carry a significant amount of insecurities. My art was never a collected, congruent, or themed body of work. I just had a bunch of random paintings and drawings that i didn't know what to do with. Who am I to claim I'm an artist, when people would ask "what do you paint?" Me: "ummmmmm anything?". I went to college hoping to seek some clarity in that direction. The reality is I hardly created anything in college. What I did excel at was academics! I dove into books like they were a 12ft pool of the freshest water on the planet. I loved research! Power points presentations? oh talk dirty to me. It is silly but I loved school! it was easy for me. But that was not fulfilling to my identity, who am i? A student? well yah there are 30,000 students at my school alone, what makes you any different? Well 3 1/2 years of school, I graduated top of my class with many awards and honors. Now what? I did my best at that thing called college, I think I kind of killed it actually, but who cares? kids do that every year. Now I get to start making my contribution to the world. I had several career paths i could have followed, many very successful ones too! I moved back to my home town with my fiancé to start our post college lives, (aka the rest of our lives, yikes!). He is in the process of becoming a Police Officer. Not taking away from the rigor required to become a law enforcement officer, but it is a beautifully laid out path that he gets to follow to his dream job! While I'm over here with useless papers flying in the air around me from school, a pencil in my hair, a paint brush in my mouth, and frantically looking for jobs in Seattle that I could actually use my Art History degree and three minors (whoopee).But I stuck to job searches in my field, I told myself "don't deviate you won't be happy". I had a fall back plan to Starbucks if all else failed (Native Seattle Girl here!). I landed a fantastic job at a Glass Art Studio that I love. I have been working for this amazing artists. Working for her, and learning what it is to run a small business, i gained my clarity. All my insecurities that held me back, she had them too. She struggled with the very same identity crisisI had, and she in my eyes is extraordinarily successful! How could she not know who she is as an artist? What we both kind of realized together was we were measuring ourselves against other artists rather than just measuring ourselves. I will never be satisfied with my identity if I'm measuring it against other people. Because there is no other Matty Malone, and I don't want to be just like everyone else, i want to be me. The only way to do that is focus my efforts inwardly. I started to paint again, and i mean really truly paint. While it is my love, I also started to treat it like a job. If i want this to be my career I better treat it like one now! Then it kind of hit me, I get to identify who I am, i get to declare what I want to be. I want to be an artist. Therefore, I am and Artist. I am a teacher, I am and entrepreneur, I am Matty. So, I have defined who I am, I have declared I am an artist, now lets take this outward... meaning into the world. oh boy. Easier said than down people! Those insecurities creep back and you negative nancy that sits on her couch and judges everything you do starts to yap! Well you tell her, "Shush Nancy nobody asked you!" I took steps forwards towards what makes me happy now, and what will make me happy for the rest of my life. This website was another step. It was time to brand myself and create a logo. Oh my goodness i spent hours trying to design my personal logo... i am an artist after all shouldn't i design my own logo? Cue that image of papers in the air, pencil in my hair, and paint brush in my mouth? Yup that was the scene on my coffee table. The poppy flower was the obvious answer. The first painting I displayed (and sold) in a gallery was a big, red, poppy flower. My career took off with this painting I did for some friends as a wedding guest book of a field of flowers, and poppies were the primary flower.. I sold three prints of it shortly after and it helped me pay my rent in college. Poppies have continued to be a theme of success, and comfort in my life. If i don't know what to draw i can always doodle a poppy and it makes me happy. At the end of the day, the brand, the title, the career is only the way it is because of you. You have that power to brand your life how you want. So if anyone else is in an identity crisis, deep breaths. What do you love? What makes you happy? are you doing that? No? Well maybe you should start and you will find your way.